When Withdrawal Stalls Your Life

When I was going through this withdrawal process of getting off psych meds, I had so many life circumstantial things that I was looping about and terrified about, that I didn't know if I could resolve. I felt so stuck.

So if that's you, if you're like, "I am so stuck, I have this thing I need to resolve, this challenge, this stage of life thing, like a career or relationship or something, but I'm stuck because of this withdrawal," you feel like you're in a catch-22 and you can't get out.

That is part of going through this process. It just seems to come with the package. So I want to talk with you about that hope. That's what we're going to focus on today, hope. So if you need hope about something you're feeling really hopeless about through your withdrawal process, please stay tuned. I'd love to share with you my hope.

Life Stages Hit Pause

What I've noticed is that this happens to us at a particular time in our life development. Each stage of life has its own tasks, its own responsibilities, its own joys and its own sorrows. So when this happens, it's like our whole momentum in that stage of life just comes to a screeching halt, and we're completely disoriented. We feel stuck, like we're not making any progress or have any hope about doing well through that stage of life.

I'll give you some examples. If you're in a career development stage of life where you're like, "I've gotta figure out how to get myself out in the working world, but I can't because of this withdrawal process," or, "It's just really limiting me," or, "I can't even tell what I like anymore," you might really be looping about that and afraid about it.

Or it could be, "I want to have kids, and I just can't, my body can't do it," or, "I have kids, and I can't seem to keep up the way I want, and I'm afraid this is ruining their childhood," or, "I want to find someone to marry or a partner, but I can't because I don't have the energy to meet new people when I'm in this state."

Or it could be another stage, like a career transition, or having marriage problems but now feeling too unwell to work through them well. Or trying to connect with grandkids and support your own children as they figure out their adult lives, but now you're in crisis. Every stage of life has its challenges. It could be an older stage where you were supposed to be able to do things you enjoy and contribute to others, and you just don't have the energy or the ability or the focus because you're going through this healing process.

This Won't Ruin Your Trajectory

So basically it can feel like this is just the worst timing it could possibly be, and it is ruining your trajectory. That's the way it can feel. But I'm just going to call that out, this does not ruin your trajectory. It may feel like that, and that's a totally valid feeling, because this is so disorienting and so confusing and frustrating.

But in the midst of this, there is good happening. Right now you can't feel that, especially if you're in a deep wave. You can't feel the good. But those things that seem unreachable, impossible, like they'll never be fixed, or hopeless, it is amazing how quickly those things can resolve in their right timing.

In their right timing. There were things that I looped about so much that seemed completely unresolvable to me, and a big part of that is the withdrawal process and not being able to have that perspective, because we can't see all the hundreds of ways that our life challenges and our life purpose could be fulfilled, could even be catapulted, or could be resolved in so many different ways.

When Hope Feels Impossible

We kind of just don't have the imagination for that in withdrawal. And so I just want to encourage you, take others' word for it, whether it's people who've already healed, or encouraging people in your life who know what it's like to suffer and be disoriented. You don't know how this could resolve, and how this could turn out actually in a beautiful way.

So that's my hope to you, especially as you get through your healing, there could be so many ways that you're able to engage with those challenges in a whole new way. And especially because of what this healing process will do to you as a person. I know you may feel afraid, like, "It's gonna ruin me." "I'm nothing of what I was, I'm a fraction of who I was." That's how it can feel, like you are just getting chopped down to a fraction or a specimen portion of what you used to be, or what you could be if you weren't being submerged under this horrible suffering.

But the thing is, the real you is still there, and there's so much hope. I've heard this from other people who've healed, there are amazing things that can somehow be gained through this suffering. I can't tell you exactly what you will gain, but there's something there for each one of us.

Growth Through Suffering

Some of the things I've heard, and this is suffering broadly, but also specifically with drugs, a severe suffering, is there are so many ways it can reorient you for the rest of your life and deepen you. For some people, you just appreciate life so much more. You see it so differently on the other side. The small things bring you so much joy, and you have an appreciation for, a wonder and a connection to the beauty in life, and an acceptance of your own limits and of time, and your place within time.

It could be relational. It could be spiritual, your relationship with God and a spiritual transformation. I definitely experienced transformation in that healing that I don't think would have happened to me any other way. It could be relationships, there could actually be relationships that happen that are life-changing for you even in the midst of this, even though that seems impossible. It could be that your values change to be more aligned with your core self and with what you want your life to be aligned with, and your sense of purpose.

A lot of people say they become more compassionate, more loving people through this. So you just don't know what is in there for you. But my encouragement to you is that this can be a transforming time in your life, and to try to see it as that, even though that may feel impossible at times.

Transformation on the Other Side

That's my encouragement from this side of it. Those things that seem impossible to overcome, those challenges in your life, there could be so many ways that they just beautifully and naturally resolve as you heal and as you come out of this and come to the other side. And I definitely experienced that. My relationship to God, my prayer life, my sense of purpose, all of those things went through a transformation through this. And it really feels like I got goods out of the process rather than just bad.

So that's my encouragement to you, that the things you're most afraid of aren't necessarily predictors of your future. They're just fears. And those fears are actually a part of this process, a part of something you have to survive and get through. And those things, even those fear factors themselves, will calm down in time as you heal.

Take Heart

So take heart. And I just wanted to share that with you. And if you're looking for someone to talk with specifically about the specific fears and stage of life concerns that are really coming up for you, definitely reach out, join one of our groups or book to meet with one of us one-on-one. But just know that there's so much hope and healing ahead, no matter how dark it seems right now.

❤️‍🩹 Joanna