How to Cope Through the Worst Days of Withdrawal

I want to talk with you today about coping through the absolute worst days of psychiatric drug withdrawal. If you are in that place where you are saying, "I cannot see past this suffering. It is so severe. My symptoms are so intense. I cannot see past this," I want to walk with you through making a plan for coping through the worst days of withdrawal in five simple steps.

I've made a digital version of this plan here. It's a resource for you to use in figuring out your plan for getting through some of those worst symptom days in psychiatric drug withdrawal.

This Is Not All There Is

I just have to tell you, I have been there, and so many others have been there, and this is not all there is. There is so much beyond this suffering that you cannot see, or even grab onto, right now, but there is so much after this. This is not what's going to be forever and ever and ever. So please, just take my story of hope, and there are so many other stories of hope, and know that this is not all there is, even when it is so intense you cannot see past it.

There is healing, there is hope, and there is a life for you after this suffering.

There are also a lot of other resources I share throughout this post that can help you through some of these worst days.

Step 1: Find Your Why

Step one is your why. Why do you want to weather this storm of psychiatric drug withdrawal symptoms?

This is about connecting to your core motives, and this is so helpful because it's something we can lose sight of when the symptoms are so bad that we can't even reach. We can get disconnected from our own core motives. So this is about asking, "What are the things that are worthwhile for me? What is it I want to be there for?" It's about connecting to that core place of yourself, because any time we do something hard, we have a motivation. We have a reason why we would want to go through it, why it would be worthwhile for us. So this is about connecting to that while you go through this really hard healing process.

This is personal. It is different for different people. So take a moment to connect with yourself and think about, in your big picture, what is your why? What is it you want to be there for?

The rest of the steps are about the how, and that is your strategy for coping with the worst days of withdrawal symptoms.

Step 2: Someone to Call

Step two is someone to call. There is so much good in being able to connect with others when we're going through this. That co-regulation of connecting with someone else is actually healing for your nervous system. It helps cue your nervous system into safety. Our nervous systems are so sensitized through this whole process that we need that co-regulation, to be able to calm and soothe. So in this step, you're going to figure out who your safe people are that you can call.

Friends and Family

For the first option, I put friends and family. This could be anybody in your personal life who is not critical, who is not going to do something that's against your plan, but is supportive, is safe, can hold space for you, and has a calming presence. Anyone like that is so helpful and healing for you, and you may be surprised about who this is. It may not end up being the people you've been closest to. It might be someone else who becomes your go-to person to call through this.

If you're in a place where you're saying, "I don't have anyone to call," or "I don't know who that is," I have good news for you. That is something you can figure out while going through this process. I have another video on how to find your people, and we can work through the steps of figuring out who those safe people are for you.

So just know, if you're thinking, "I don't know who that is right now," that is something we can figure out and work on. It may be someone you meet in this process. It could also be a therapist. It could be so many different kinds of people.

Usually it's someone who's calming, who's grounded, and who has already been through suffering. That's what I see a lot for people who have a safe person: it's usually someone who has been through suffering and is calming and emotionally safe.

When Your Inner Circle Changes

For me, that was different people during withdrawal. Different people were in my inner circle than had been before. That is a phenomenon of withdrawal: sometimes the inner-circle people we've been close to aren't actually equipped to support us through this. So we may need other people to come in closer who are able to support us through our healing process.

There is also resourcing and support for your family members, and I have a video on that, because sometimes friends and family, when they are resourced and can learn about this, can be more supportive and more of a healing support to you. But it also may be that you need different people in your inner circle.

So take a few moments to think through, "Who are my safe people?" Write those into your plan and let them know. You can even send this plan to them so they're aware. And if you don't know who those people are, I have another video coming for you, and we can work through figuring out who those people are for you.

A Warm Line

The next option for someone to call, especially if you're saying, "I don't know who that is right now," is a warm line. This can be a great resource for your coping strategy, because it's peer support from someone who's trained, who's emotionally safe, who's supportive, and who can listen to you, and it's a 24/7 call line.

So if you're having a very intense time, with very intense symptoms, and you just cannot see past it, and you don't know who to call, whether it's because you don't have family and friends who are able to be supportive at the moment, or they're at work or can't take a call right now, this can be a great resource. It's someone to call who will be supportive, who can be with you in a moment of need, be a good listener, and be kind. They're trained, but it's peer support, and it's called a warm line. The link is in the plan, and it can be part of your strategy.

Step 3: Somewhere to Go

We've got our why, we've got our someone to call, and now step three is somewhere to go. This is another layer of that co-regulation and soothing, by being in safe places and with safe people.

Safe People Nearby

This can be friends or family who are local. It could be someone you know in your community who is just very soothing and supportive. So the first option is basically someone in your personal life who's local. If you have that, amazing. A lot of people don't, and that's okay. I didn't have a lot of in-person, local places I could go with safe people. So if you don't have that, it is okay. But just think through, "Do I have anyone I could go sit with in a moment when I'm having very intense symptoms, who would be supportive of me and calm, and help me to soothe?"

It doesn't have to be anyone highly trained. Really, just being with people who are understanding and supportive is very healing to us in this. So simple things like sitting together drinking tea, or going for a walk. If they are emotionally safe and supportive, and they say, "Hey, yeah, I'll walk with you. I'll go with you," or, "Just come on a ride with me while I do my errands," that can actually be very healing for you as far as co-regulation. That's a lot of what we need through this, because our bodies are really taking it to the hilt with extreme symptoms and freaking out. So someone else's calm nervous system and soothing presence, their regular breathing, their talking, the normal pace of how they're going about their day, can actually be very healing and soothing for you, if they are emotionally safe and available.

So if you have that, awesome. Make it part of your plan. If you have a loving friend who'll take a walk with you, that is very healing and great to have on a really bad day of symptoms. If you don't have that, that is okay. We have other options.

Safe Places

The other option is safe places. This is a list of places where you feel safer, places that bring you just that little bit of calm and regulation. This could be a coffee shop that always has really soothing music and pleasant baristas, and it's familiar to you. Or it could be a park that's very calming for you.

For some of my healing process, I could not really get out of the house without it getting worse. So it could also be places in your house that feel more soothing. There might be a certain corner of your house with a stuffed chair that's a very calming place for you. Or it could be your bed with a weighted blanket. So go ahead and list, as part of your plan, any soothing, safe places for you.

If this is hard to come up with, that is completely understandable. In withdrawal, there's so much we feel scared of and so much that doesn't feel safe. So it's just finding those few things. Even if it's just a few things, figure out what those are for you.

Group Calls

You have another option too, and that is group calls. This is kind of like being with presence, virtually. I have listed links to all different options of group calls with other people who are healing and can be a safe space for you.

There's Life After Meds groups, through my website here. Then there's Heartcore Collective, which is Angie Peacock's website and offerings. She has great groups that are really healing. There are also free groups through ACE Peer Support. These are free, peer-led support calls, and there are several of those a day. So this also can be a great resource if you're thinking, "I need something today that I can go to, with people who would understand and help me to soothe."

Another one is the Wildflower Alliance. They have support calls listed almost every single day, a lot of times several a day, for people who are really, really suffering very acute symptoms. It's peer-led, it's supportive, and it's focused on hope.

Any of these are good options, and all of those links are in the plan, so they can be part of your go-to when you need it.

Step 4: Something to Do

The fourth step is something to do. These are things you can do for your body that will help cue your body into safety, because a lot of what's happening is in the body. It is biological. It is a huge healing process, and our bodies have a reaction to that. So these are things you can do to basically communicate safety to your body when your body is getting a sense of constant alarm.

Tune In to What Actually Helps

I have listed a bunch of options for you, and you can select any that you think would work for you. The thing I want to encourage you about is to tune in to what actually does help you. You'll know if you do something and, instead of calming you a little bit, it aggravated things and made them worse. Then that's not part of your strategy.

Like the whole plan, this is very personal. It is you in the driver's seat, deciding what is really, actually healing and soothing for you, and tuning in to your own body to figure that out. I have listed a bunch of options here, but you can also write out anything you have done before that has helped.

These things can help you cope through really bad symptoms in a really bad wave. That doesn't mean they make the symptoms disappear. I mean, amazing if they do! But they don't have to make the symptoms disappear in order to have worked. It's more like giving you more ability to cope, and often you'll notice they may help reduce the symptoms and make things more bearable.

TIPP for the Most Intense Moments

The first set of options are from TIPP. This is a great tool for a moment of very, very intense symptoms. It's a way to basically surprise your body into calming down. It taps into that very basic body-calming ability of shocking our body into a calmer state. I have a link walking you through the steps of TIPP, and you can use it at any point. It can be part of your strategy, or you can just have it in there as a resource if you ever need it.

More Ways to Cue Your Body Into Safety

I have a bunch of others as well. One is to lie down in a dark place with a weighted blanket. Take a hot shower, take a walk in nature, or listen to music; that helps me. There may be gentle foods that help you, or a warm drink. Listening to a meditation audio, and I have links to options for that. Maybe grounding yourself with bare feet. Reading or listening to stories of hope. And you can also write down any other things you've used before that have been helpful for you in coping, in calming, and in cueing your body into safety.

Step 5: Truths to Remember

The fifth step is truths to remember. This is a simple reminder to ourselves of what is true, because we can lose sight of that in the intensity of a deep wave. We can lose sight of simple truths, and they can even seem totally unreal to us. This is a time for you to write down your truths. I have a list here that you can also select from, and I'll read them.

These truths are important because they are things you know to be true at other times, and you want to remind yourself of them when you're feeling the symptoms so intensely that you forget these basic truths. So I'm going to read them for you, and then you can add any others you want yourself to remember.

I will heal.
I am not alone.
Others have felt this way too, survived it, and gone on to better days.
I am loved.
I belong to others.
This will pass.
I have felt better before, and I will feel better again.

Then go ahead and write out any others that are personal for you, that you want yourself to remember.

There Is So Much After This

Thank you so much for doing this plan with me. I admire you all for everything you are facing and overcoming, and you have so much after this. Right now, in the crux of this suffering, you can't see how good it could get and how your life could unfold so beautifully after this. But just take my word for it: there is so much good after the intensity of this suffering.

I have stories of hope, and many others have stories of hope, so please listen to those stories as part of your healing, and just know that there is more. There is more after this.

Please lean into any of the resources I've listed. We are cheering you on, and there is so much for you ahead. So much good.

❤️‍🩹 Joanna